First Ape On The Move

Curious George Bush has taken wing and landed in San Antonio in order to smile and pose for the Big News Media cameras. He glad-handed his way through a team of National Guardsmen, chatting and grinning before returning to Air Force One which is now en route to the White House.

Bush canceled plans to attend the Republican National Convention in order to monitor Hurricane Gustav more closely. I must say he certainly appears to be working hard pumping all those hands. As for his decision to blow off the RNC, I think it's a huge fumble. With the hundreds of reporters in attendance, Bush is missing the perfect vehicle to prove his leadership and speak to the nation about what's going right during this crisis.

His handlers seem to think it would be inappropriate for him to appear at the convention, but honestly, what better venue could he ask for to reassure the country, specifically the Gulf Coast, that the danger is not yet past, but that things are going much better this time around. One more example of just how clueless his administration really is.

On the local side, one CNN reporter found a section of the Upper Ninth floodwall that had crumbled near the base and was allowing water to gush into the area. According to an un-named Army Corpsman, the floodwall is designed to crack and crumble at the bottom in order to ease pressure on the top of the wall.

What The Fuck?

I've been in New Orleans for thirty years and this is the first I've heard of this! Intentionally building weak spots at the bottom? Are you serious? Can someone confirm this, or is this the ACE attempting to snow the media into thinking that all is well?

At any rate, Gustav is now a Cat 1 storm and its eye is bearing down on Baton Rouge. I send prayers and the help of Queen Marie up north and hope you weather the storm with as little damage as possible. There are still a few feeder bands on the way to the Crescent City, but it looks as if these will pass by the end of the night. One bright spot is that they are separated by large bands of clear weather which should allow any accumulated flood waters to drain somewhat in the time between bands.

Humberto Rising

It's Thursday, September 12th, just past nine in the Ante of the Meridiem. As I type, TS/H Humberto is slowly creeping east toward our homes. Already the storm has knocked out power for 100,000 Tejans and reportedly killed one. This bodes not well for our town as the current administration has yet to clear many sewers of Katrina's debris, not to mention the collective trash of the past fifty years. Mark my words, if Humberto doesn't die out in the next six hours, we will soon be swimming in the streets again. Remember, the slower it moves, the longer it dumps on us. This is your Action Weather Pest, signing off for now.

As for the winds, well, I recently had the Army Corps contractors over for a Garden Party and they had a work order different from the estimate given to me by the ACE. The upshot of it is, the tree leaning toward my neighbors house is still leaning toward my neighbors house and the tree whose branches are spreading through the power lines still has its branches spreading through the power lines. As the lead tree guy told me, "I wouldn't worry about those. You haven't had any big storms or hurricanes yet."

Well thanks for your brilliant insight you myopic twat. It's the storms in the future I'm worried about! So far, the City of Kenner, the Parish of Jefferson, the ACE, and Entergy have all picked up little twigs and sticks from the yard, each claiming that they or the ACE would bring these trees down. After the first four months of waiting I brought two down myself, but they were relatively small and not leaning over the neighbors or next to high voltage lines. Two years later and still getting that good old Beauraucratic Runaround. My tax dollars at rest, eh? I wonder how much I'll be able to sue them for if these trees come down during Humberto? I better shove the attorney section of the Yellow Pages in some Tupperware, I may need them!